I can usually tell when a film is not going to be for me during the opening sequence. In The French Italian, the opposite held true. A group of friends reunited to share life updates when Doug (Aristotle Athari) and Valerie (Catherine Cohen) begin to tell a story about their mysterious yet annoying neighbors. The funny and harmless invasiveness on the lives and privacy of a neighbor (Jon Rudnitsky) and his girlfriend Mary (Chloe Cherry) drew me in quickly. However, as the story progressed, the film and storytelling soared to my personal irritation. And the result was a painfully unfunny script that feels like it was created out of boredom.

In a brownstone apartment complex in New York City, Doug spends his time working from home while Valerie seeks new employment opportunities. Feeling a bit disconnected from their friends’ lives, they begin to spy on their neighbors for daily excitement. What initially starts out as making fun of their harmless grievances quickly turns into pure hatred for their noisy neighbors. In between them arguing all day then purchasing a karaoke machine, Doug and Valerie cannot seem to find the serenity they once had. As a result, the couple moves upstate, giving up their rent-controlled apartment, to begin plotting their revenge by putting on a fake Broadway play and casting Mary in it.

Wolther’s writing & directing are confident but don’t land effectively.

Rachel Wolther’s feature debut, The French Italian, aims to poke fun at the troubles that may come with living in New York City. Most of us know that the city itself is already filled with a plethora of noise from transportation systems and angry drivers to even construction work. Here lies a story about what happens when that noise begins to take over the one place that is supposed to be a safe haven away from all the clatter: one’s home. Pushing the boundaries of what it means to retaliate, the film is 92 minutes of cringe-worthy behavior and dialogue that never seem to end.

As written, the writer/director seems to thoroughly understand the grievances that come with having loud, intolerable neighbors. It’s quite unfortunate for me, but it is the very thing that made me not like this script. The French Italian comes off like a film about people so bored with their lives that they have to conjure up a plan to embarrass their neighbor. What’s even more vexing is coming to the realization that a simple conversation could’ve halted all their grumbles if they just had the confidence to be honest with them. But alas, this is a movie. And a quick resolution of the conflict would have ended the plot before it even began.

The French Italian feels like a chore to get through because of unfunny dialogue.

At minimum, there is something of value to take from Wolther’s debut. If anything, one should be grateful that most people don’t resort to fixating on others as a means to generate any sense of fulfillment. Realistically, when people do, it never brings the craved satisfaction that one would hope, rather delusion. And it is exactly how it plays out in this movie. The cast keeps up with such requirements of their characters. Though it generated very few laughs from me, there’s a crowd out there that would certainly love this long-lasting gag.

The film is 92 minutes of cringe-worthy behavior and dialogue that never seem to end.

An ultimate chore to get through, The French Italian is an unamusing story about neighborly complaints that result in extreme escalation and action. While writer/director Rachel Wolther acknowledges the inherent humor that comes with such situations, the comedy doesn’t always land. There’s no doubt in my mind that this film will find its audience, however. For those able to handle deliberate obnoxiousness, you may even find it funny. But as the story unfolds and Doug & Valerie are pushed to misery, watching it all go down made me feel the exact same way.

The French Italian premiered at the 2024 Tribeca Film Festival.